TheBrink

Day 14: Being There, Grief, Packing Commences

Today I: Spent time with my ex-husband and the kids, submitted my loan documents, started to pack the house, and was rather glad about all the rain.

It thundered and rained all day...

Bucketing down... no garden work for me today... did spend embarrassing amount of time admiring my new drain in action (see Day 13) Yes the pool is direly brown

Bucketing down... no garden work for me today... did spend embarrassing amount of time admiring my new drain in action (see Day 13)

Yes the pool is direly brown

My ex-husband's mum, the kids Grandma, passing away yesterday, meant most of today was spent 'being there.'  

Being There is an odd state of affairs.  You're surrounded by highly emotional grieving people, and are sad but not so heartbroken.  You tread so very carefully, but everyone is edgy and snappy and patience is required. You want to help, but they don't know what they need, and suggestions have to be simple and distracting. You want to cheer them up... but its just not the right time for cheer.

I arrived with coffee and donuts, Miss 10 went to school by choice - owing to an important role in a skit to be performed at lunchtime - and Miss 11, my gentle one who feels every emotion so deeply, just sat on the couch and cried.  My ex, starting to come out of the initial shock began to make solid plans to be with his family.  I suggested a trip to Westfield; food, people, sparkly distractions... it was ideal.  They both perked up over a sugar loaded breakfast, and a trip around Target and some happy chat about lighthearted things had us all feeling a bit less overwhelmed by it all.  

In the afternoon I started to pack.  A POD is turning up on Saturday, and most of my gear is going into storage until the Wollongong house is liveable.  I began in Miss 10s room... mostly so that I could turf out forgotten junk without her starting with the "OMG I LOVE THAT LOVE IT MUST KEEP IT FOREVER AND EVER HOW COULD YOU THROW IT OUT WAAAAAAH... and so on and so forth..."

It took all afternoon to get that tip into shape.  Don't tell Miss 10 but I got THREE bags of rubbish out... mostly happy meal toys... and found $0.35... finders keepers I reckon.